[The fingers running through his hair both soothe and agitate him, but nothing doesn't agitate him in his current state. He feels too delicate, too sensitive - everything seems to be poised to hurt him, to make him feel small and awful.
But he can't hold it against Chizuru. Not Chizuru - not his precious sister. The most important person in the world to him, who he had forgotten for so long... He doesn't think he'll be able to forgive himself for that, even though a small, vindictive corner of his dormant mind whispers to him that this is being even. He violently pushes that thought away, shaking his head against her as he pulls himself closer still. Maybe this closeness will be able to relieve some of the toxic feelings that are bubbling to the surface. He wants nothing to do with those heavy weights.]
I won't— I'll never go anywhere! I don't want to leave! Please, please, please—
[He doesn't want her to leave either, but he's so afraid. She knows - she knows, doesn't she? About this rottenness inside of him... He suddenly feels hideously ashamed.]
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But he can't hold it against Chizuru. Not Chizuru - not his precious sister. The most important person in the world to him, who he had forgotten for so long... He doesn't think he'll be able to forgive himself for that, even though a small, vindictive corner of his dormant mind whispers to him that this is being even. He violently pushes that thought away, shaking his head against her as he pulls himself closer still. Maybe this closeness will be able to relieve some of the toxic feelings that are bubbling to the surface. He wants nothing to do with those heavy weights.]
I won't— I'll never go anywhere! I don't want to leave! Please, please, please—
[He doesn't want her to leave either, but he's so afraid. She knows - she knows, doesn't she? About this rottenness inside of him... He suddenly feels hideously ashamed.]